To The Bottom and Back . . .

When I was making the climb back out of my "hole" of sin and sorrow, I wrote a poem trying to explain what it felt like. I titled it "To the Bottom and Back"

Do you know what it's like at the bottom of the sea?
It's dark and dreary and you can barely see.
The water's so cold and it eats at your skin.
You can hardly breath and your oxygen's thin.
The pressure upon you is like nothing you've known.
Even if you're with others, you feel all alone.
There's beautiful wonders swimming right beside you
but you can not see them, no matter what you do.
You sink to the bottom and can't see the sun.
You look at the sand and think . . . what have I done.
You wonder if ever you'll see the light of day,
but never start swimming, you just sit there and sway.
You hope that a fisherman, out on a boat
will notice you down there and keep you afloat.
But no one can see you, they don't know you are there.
So you have to start swimming, or you'll run out of air.
So suddenly you decide to do something brave
and swim for your life out of this watery grave.
Your feet are so heavy and your heart feels the same.
You feel like you are drowning in a sea full of shame.
But you know you must go or you'll never be free.
So you take that first step back to the edge of the sea.
You swim with your arms, your legs and your heart.
You know it's a long trip, but you need somewhere to start.
The pressure starts to lessen and the water's not so cold
then you embrace the sunlight, shinning yellow and gold.
You start to swim faster and suddenly you find
that your strong tribulations weren't one of a kind.
You find that your feet are as light as a feather
and that you breath the sunlight that you will forever treasure.
You burst through the waves, so cold and so blue
to find family and friends waiting to help you.
They rescue your body, your mind and your soul.
You did it! You made it! What a glorious goal.
They were there with their eyes full of gratuitous tears
then you found that they shared your trials and fears.

The Lord is our sun, so bright and so true
so always remember no matter what you do
That the sea may look tempting on his sunny days
but when you hit bottom, all that's left is the haze
and wishing for sunlight and the cold emptiness
so remember . . . KEEP SWIMMING . . . and he'll do the rest.

So take it from me, for to the bottom I have been
that Jesus the Christ, is a fisher of men.

Ann Montgomery